Saturday Snippets #4

Note: Prizes inside! (Keep reading.)

A.

I designed it myself.

I designed it myself.

A few weeks ago, Oscar chewed up the fastener on his collar (we were home and so had taken it off him due to excessive jingling). Such behaviour should probably not be rewarded, except the reward was probably more for me, really. I’m not sure what I was rewarding myself for, particularly as it ended up costing, you know–money. But now Oscar has a nice new collar and a custom-designed dog-tag, with his own “infra-red-ed” face on the front of it. (The back says his name and my phone number and “Inveterate Couch Potato. Help me get home.”) Yesterday he got a haircut.

Before the haircut

Before the haircut

What a spiffy boy

What a spiffy boy!

B.

It turns out that if I say, “That month-long cold everybody’s had or is getting?” I might really mean everybody. I might also not mean cold. It could be a flu. Or maybe a clu. That’s what I’m going with. It started digging its tenacious claws into my throat on Thursday, progressing so obviously that I probably could have live-blogged it. Which I didn’t, but by posting about it on Facebook, I discovered it’s also running around London and . . . New Zealand?! Anybody other in locales want to register its presence? Speak up if you know the illness to which I refer. (In which case, I’m sorry to hear it, but suffering seems to be more tolerable when it’s shared, right?)

C.

I guess because I never use the find-and-replace function when wordprocessing, unless it’s to replace, say, the name Zkharyah with Z’kharyah, I was unaware that when you click on Replace All, all really means all. Like, in-the-middle-of-a-word all.

My last class of the term was Thursday night and, on account of the rapidly more and more virulent clu described in Snippet B, I realised I was going to miss it. However, I wanted to get Part 3 of my Confessional Paper done–ideally before class started–so I was working on it most of the afternoon. After I had finished it, I noticed that in Part 1, I used the pronouns they, them and their when referring to humans, but in Part 3 I was using we, us and our. I preferred my Part 3 approach, but even though these “Parts” were being turned in separately, since technically they were meant to be all one paper, I thought I should probably make my pronouns in Part 3 consistent with my pronouns in Part 1. I searched for all the first-person-plural pronouns and replaced them with a click, with third-person-plural pronouns.

It’s a good thing I read through it two more times, because suddenly the paper was peppered with words like:

  1. Exodthem
  2. bettheyen
  3. conclthemion
  4. constitthemion
  5. ththem
  6. theyre (without the apostrophe)
  7. theme (when it wasn’t meant to say theme) and, my personal favourite:
  8. themurp

I just hope I caught them all. By the time this happened, I had a fever and must have been slightly delirious because themurp set me squealing with laughter, tears pouring down my face, for about fifteen minutes. Shemp kept looking at me like What is wrong with her? which, of course, just made me laugh all the harder. I decided it was probably a good thing I wasn’t going to class, because now even the real words were starting to look funny, but for better or for worse, I sent the paper anyway.

And now we can play a game! And it shall be called . . . (drumroll, please)

BizarroWord

(That says, “BizarroWord!” in case you can’t read it. I’ve never made a blog badge before. I know. You can tell.)

This game goes by points, and there are multiple ways you can get them. Only one of the ways involves totally subjective judging on my part. Ready?

  • Points for each original word (of the above 8 words) you can guess (easy peasey): 1
  • Points for each alternative definition to the new BizarroWords above: 2
  • Points for each BizarroWord you use in a sentence according to your definition: 2
  • Points for the best alternative definition of each word: 3

Work with as few or as many words as you like–just remember that more words equal more points. If you win, it’s your choice of an autographed copy of Trees in the Pavement or, because a lot of you (I’m being optimistic) already have your own, a box of apple muffins, inspired by Kiley. Actually, I’m so inspired by Kiley, I’m totally stealing her Fictionary rules. (Sorry/thanks, Kiley.)

  1. Incorporate your words/definitions/sentences into a blogpost.
  2. Tag your post “BizarroWord.”
  3. Put that snazzy BizarroWord badge on your blog.
  4. Link your post and the badge back to here: https://thatsajennstory.wordpress.com/2013/03/16/saturday-snippets-4/ (That’s this post, but I’m sure you knew that.)
  5. Send your Readership over here to play, too. The more the merrier!

Entries close on 29 March (two weeks from today). On that day, I’ll tally up the points and let you know who the winner is. Have fun, and may the best Wordsmith win!

*************************************************************************************************************************

Another note: If you don’t have a blog and you still want to play, just post your responses in the comments. But please also pass along the info of this giveaway on your Facebook or Twitter pages. Thanks!

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20 thoughts on “Saturday Snippets #4

  1. Pingback: Irreplaceable or Bizzaroword, Is That the Question? | food4thoughtfood4life

  2. Exodthem
    1. Exodus
    2. Forcing grammarly handicapped people to leave the building.
    3. If them would speak proper English, them could stay a while, but now I’d rather exodthem.

    Bettheyen
    1. I got nothing
    2. Ponder upon what to eat for dinner.
    3. How about pasta? That’s okay, we can still bettheyen.

    Conclthemion
    1. Conclusion
    2. Coughing up that green stuff that had been blocking your throat for days.
    3. ‘Hold on, I think I may finally have my conclthemion.’

    Constitthemion
    1. Constitution
    2. When a bus or train is so crowded you cannot pass easily.
    3. ‘Let’s take the next one, this one is constitthemion.’

    Ththem
    1. Thus
    2. A minor, unplanned surprise.
    3. ‘What a ththem, there’s a $10 bill in my pocket!’

    Theyre
    1. Still not a clue
    2. Archaic English for ‘deer’.
    3. Shan’t we be humble, lest we stumble; thyself thy heir, evermore thirsty, like a runaway theyre.

    Theme (pronounced as something between thumb and tomb; don’t ask why, I didn’t make the rules)
    1. Use
    2. When your little toe slams the door.
    3. I feel a little lame, maybe it’s because of the theme yesterday.

    Themurp
    1. Usurp
    2. In a family with many kids, themurp is almost the youngest.
    3. ‘I have one younger sister, that makes me themurp.’

  3. Pingback: BizarroWord – A Jenn Initiative | The Blurred Line

  4. Pingback: Blog Loving: Bizarroword | visitingmissouri

  5. Pingback: BizarroWord – A Jenn Initiative | The Blurred Line

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