After my last two word-rant posts were soundly (and correctly) corrected by astute and intrepid members of The Readership (to whom I am honestly grateful) I began to take stock of my linguistic snobbery and have decided that it’s just safer to stop pointing out other people’s errors because I invariably make my own in the process of pointing out the others. This has happened in private, too–I recently noted a consistent error to a blogging friend of mine and in the email in which I did this, I made two or three ridiculous and glaring typos.

I don’t think there were any hard feelings, this person being quite gracious, and I certainly would prefer to have my errors pointed out so I don’t make them again, but I have to say I’m pretty sure Jesus wasn’t kidding when He said not to judge or we’d be judged in the same way as we judged. I’ve found this to be true in other judgey areas of my life. I must have thought there was some sort of pass for grammar snarks. Oh well.

Anyway, under the influence of this new resolution, it occurred to me that I could still, in public, make fun of my own word usage. With that in mind, I show you a copy of the kind of weekly update nonsense I send to the poor unsuspecting (well–they probably have a pretty good idea of what they’re in for at this point) teenagers of Now Church’s Youth Group. As of, like, September, I call these updates YoothNooz. Because bad spelling is acceptable if it’s intentional and especially if I’m the one committing it, of course. (If I could figure out how to make an umlaut on my computer, I’d probably call it YuthNuz, with umlauts over the u‘s.) That’s bad enough. But wait. It gets worse:

So . . . the Renaissance Faire was rainy. And closed early. But we were enthusiastic, so whatever. Here’s a picture.
photo by random Ren Faire lady 2012

The few, the proud

This week is the CROP WALK! Don’t forget to raise some money and then come out and walk, to support people who can’t get 3 regular meals a day.
The week after that is the Bake Sale! That timing seems a little weird. Still, we need to raise money for our mission trips, too. Please come on out that Sunday after both services (9-10 and 11-12), and help sell baked goods. It would also be cool if you brought some to sell. The Bake Sale is all we are doing for youth group that week; however, if anyone feels like grabbing lunch together at Panera afterwards, I’m in.
I’ve attached a new and improved version of the schedule for the year. There is only one day left that we need to think of an activity for: January 13th. Send me your best ideas. The winner gets custody of our new group mascot, a little bear named Dale. He’s green. You say you haven’t met him yet? You should probably come to youth group. ‘Cause you know …yoothnooz, you lose! 😀
Seriously. Would you send your child to a Youth Group with someone like that in charge? It’s painful. Yet I consider myself hilarious. Which probably makes it worse–such self-deception! And I was so proud when this happened: At the above mentioned Renaissance Faire (about which you will be hearing more in another post, probably), the Sidekick and I were looking at some birds of prey and she said something apparently true, because I responded, with something of a mumble, “For real.” She looked at me sideways and said, “Don’t you mean feather real?” This poor girl has been attending Youth Group under my leadership for four and a half years. I guess she really doesn’t have a chance.
It’s always nice to know one is making a difference.

9 thoughts on “YoothNooz

  1. Wait. As I know you can be as language-picky as I am, I wonder. The German use of the umlaut (ü; ALT+0252) makes the U sounds NOT as oo, but as a sound you lack in English (to the great frustration of my fiancee, who spent months practicing her future last name, the lacking sound exists in Dutch too). Does ü substitute a oo in English?

    To see my point, try putting this: “überhaupt. uber” into google translate, which features a very decent voice program, so you can hear the difference.

  2. 🙂 I am actually smiling, and can I just say correctional humility is a wonderful companion. I am not sure what that means except knowing you a bit the snarkyness doesn’t seem quite so snarky. Now for those who don’t know you… well I would just advise them to stick around long enough till they do 😀

  3. Hmm maybe snarkiness, I can’t help thinking of Katniss during this response… not sure why? maybe she would say it with snarkness… I think I need coffee

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